Real life Stories
Every time my husband comes from work he would check my genitals to see if I slept with any man during the day when he was absent. I was not allowed to wok or get out of the house without his permission. I have suffered physical and psychological violence for many year.
Whenever he was not sure of his observations during the check he would beat me up due to suspicion to see if I would speak the truth. Over time he started checking me by pushing his hands deeper into my womanhood“, she burst into tears.
“That was not enough, until one day he burnt my thighs and my womanhood with a jerry can after suspecting that I had slept with another man. I reported my case to a police station and I was told to sort out my domestic issues with my husband. With pain a friend assisted and rushed me to Nairobi Womens Hospital. Though I was struggling to walk after leaving the hospital I could walk again properly, though with a mark which I will never forget”.
Mama Vivian is a survivor who has graduated from a victim to a survivor. She walks with other survivors helping them in their healing journey. She is a role model to many survivors who join support group as victims. She has volunteered to help survivors for the last three years since she graduated. This were her words:
“am sad every time a new support group starts because I KNOW how it feels! Like you are the only parent who has ever gone through this indescribable pain. It hurts so badly that some days you feel that you can’t go on for one more minute…but you do. Your world feels very small when you feel alone..But when you reach out, your world becomes much bigger.
The shame and the guilt can keep you alone and a prisoner. You CAN let go of those feelings! You have more strength than you even know! I promise you that! You have the power to do this! It is inside of you! My story goes back to 2011 when my spouse repeatedly abused our firstborn daughter. My world was shut: feelings of worthless, hopeless, and feelings of a bad wife filled my head. Out of desperation, I did not know what to do as I had other children, before I came into terms , my own niece confided to me that his uncle who was my spouse would touch her private parts. Suicide was the only way out; I could not figure out what else to do. A friend came along and took my two children to Nairobi Womens Hospital (GVRC) where they were treated and counseled. They were enrolled in a support group, and I too joined the caregivers support group for10 months and in 2012 I graduated as a survivor and my children too. Though we separated with my spouse, i decided to get involved in reaching out, thanks to GVRC, for giving me an opportunity to join support g group every year and even in the media, to encourage other women to protect their children no matter who is the relationship with the perpetrator. Am happy when I see caregivers who came sad with mixed bad feelings graduate and their lives are better than they joined GVRC support group.
These were the words of one caregiver who graduated in 2012. She has since then, joined our yearly support groups as role model to other new caregivers who join the group. After her healing she decided to reach out more women with abused children while going to schools to reach out students in her neighborhood. She desires to take counseling as a course. However, she is financially challenged. All these dreams were almost vanishing in the pit, thanks to GVRC through the provision of free medical and psychosocial support.
The Story of Mama Vivian